Warning : stop reading if you don't like discussing female anatomy!
Tonight is the season premier of my favorite TV show - Grey's Anatomy. I no longer have a TV so while I wait with anticipation to see if the show is aired live on ABC.com, I want to take the time share with you my favorite moment from the show. Not only did this scene make me laugh like crazy but it changed the way that the modern woman refers to her private parts as noted in this New York Times article. It is only because of this subtle unoffensive word - Va-jay-jay - that I can even write tonight's blog entry. Thank you Miranda and Oprah!
Today's downsize is being made in an effort to pay homage to the Va-jay-jay and Grey's Anatomy. Several months ago as I made a mad dash through the feminine products aisle of Hannaford I grabbed a box of tampons. Not until I arrived home and used the first of the little cotton bullets did I realize something was awry. Suddenly I had a burning feeling - literally - that things were amiss. I returned to my bathroom cabinet to investigate and found that in small print, next to the word regular were the dreaded words fresh scent. After digging through every spare purse in the house I found a lonely unscented savior and replaced it's floral scented step sister. Then, I fumed for quite awhile about the money I had wasted on the box of scented tampons. Upon comparison of the two products I realized that the packaging was almost identical and the word scented was far too camouflaged for any woman to see, especially a woman in a hormonal haze. Beyond that, I question the ethics of Tampax. According to ACOG use of scented feminine products is not recommended. In fact, in this brochure regarding Va-jay-jayitis they list scented feminine products as a big no-no. How can Tampax in good conscience put the scented boxes right next to the unscented variety? I'm beginning to wonder if they are in cahoots with the makers of Monistat.
The truly insane part of my story is that I have kept the box of scented tampons in my cabinet - tempting fate for sure. Tonight, the risk of grabbing another Va-jay-jay deodorizer is over. I contemplated placing the box of scented wonders in the locker room at work but reconsidered as I feared a yeast outbreak among my coworkers. So instead I have trashed the tampons and recycled the box. Consider this the first step in my save the Va-jay-jay movement. Now off to catch Grey's on my Mac...
My father (poor man -- one wife, two daughters, one cycle) once returned from a midnight run to CVS with "fresh scent" tampons only to hear my fourteen year old self whine, "Daaaaddddyyy! You know we're not allowed to use scented." My mother made him go back out to return them with the admonishment, "You know she's right." See all the fun Dajuan and Aaron are in for?
ReplyDeleteBethany - I can't wait to share this story with Dajuan. The fun has only just begun....
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