"I Could Hide Out Under There..."

"....I just made you say underwear" Bare Naked Ladies

After exposing Dajuan's stashing habits yesterday I figured I would dig around to reveal an equally ridiculous behavior of my own. While Dajuan hides things on tall shelves, I aim lower. Lurking under my bed was a plastic tub full of undergarments. Here's what I was able to weed out and either trash, recycle, or bag for Goodwill:
1.) Empty Leggs Hosiery box
2.) 1 of 3 identical ivory slips
3.) My first strapless bra circa 1992ish
4.) Full torso strapless bra worn under my wedding dress
5.) 2 pairs of suntan hose (note: big fashion faux pas)
6.) 2 pair of hose with picks
7.) Bra 2 sizes too big (things change after 3 babies)

After culling the stowed undergarments I was left with a pile to keep. I spied the organizational basket on a shelf above my dresser that was overflowing. Feeling in a groove, I dug through that pile of goods and eliminated enough things to make room for my "keep pile". Here is the list:
1.) Empty box from my heart rate monitor (apparently the empty box thing is epidemic around here)
2.) Two baseball hats with logos from Dajuan's former employer (another faux pas)
3.) Thread bear, paint stained pair of Dajuan's shorts (overflow from his bin I am assuming)
4.) Pair of shorts 2 sizes too big
5.) Pair of capris 1 size too big
6.) Cell phone cord for phone that I donated to ewaste Maine.

I've hit the highs and lows of downsizing today - don't you agree?

Short Order of Tall Clutter

We all have ways of dealing with clutter. My husband's method is particularly amusing, and effective on some level. Dajuan tends to gather things, put them in neat piles and then place them on the highest shelves and surfaces that exist in our home. For most of the general population, this makes his clutter "out of sight, out of mind".

When I peered up at the top shelf in one corner of our basement I spied a plastic tote (note my discussion about rubbermaid bins here) that appeared to be full of manuals and boxes. I hauled it up from the basement and laid it open in front of my hubby tonight after dinner. "Do we have to?" he moaned. Then he let out a deep belly chuckle in a sort of acknowledgement of his quirky clutter keeping habit. Together we delved into the tub and either recycled or trashed almost all of the items.

Below you will find a list of this things that were lurking in that high perch. I hope you find them as comical (and ludicrous) as we did.
1. Empty box from a camera that was stolen from my van in 2006
2. Identical camera box containing the camera that was dropped in Toddy Pond in 2003
3. Empty cell phone box from a phone that I donated to ewaste maine
4. Assembly directions to a desk that we gave to Goodwill in 2008
5. About 100 trash bag ties
6. Manual and Tag from our leather desk chair
7. Best Buy receipt from purchase of camera (see #1)
8. Time Warner Cable receipt dated 12/19/2002
9. Empty box from a surge protector purchased in 2002
10. Packaging from a camera case (see either #1 or #2)
11. Manuals from a 2002 Mac. (Note: I am blogging on our 2009 Mac)

What good is pepper with no salt?

Some things in life just seem to go together - peas and carrots, peanut butter and jelly, ebony and ivory, salt and pepper. Perhaps the sheer beauty of salt and pepper as a pair drove me to keep an unusable, empty salt shaker sitting next to the pepper shaker on my kitchen stove. It is more likely that keeping the shaker is yet another example of my tendency to keep things beyond their prime. To the best of my recollection, the salt shaker met its' demise sometime in late August. Apparently the plastic stopper melted from the heat of the stove top leaving me with nothing to plug the bottom of the shaker. Despite it's uselessness, I have kept the shaker all the while. Ah, the beauty of the challenge - exposing all of my hoarding habits.

Today as I walked in the door from work I spied the faulty shaker, chuckled and tossed it into the recycling bin. Then for good luck with my downsizing challenge I tossed a dash of salt over my shoulder and called it a day.

Unbooked

Books are certainly my go to downsize item just as Goodwill is my downsizing default location. With a mom who is a childrens literature buff and who has taught for nearly 25 years we have no choice but to possess an extensive library of our own. I have visited the Eubanks' Family Stacks several times in my first 58 days of this challenge and dear readers, I assure you today won't be my last.

As I packed up the mini van and headed for Hall School today I was equipped with a lightly used set of Fairy chapter books. With a to do list a mile long and already being behind schedule, I was happy to have a mundane donation locked and loaded as my downsize for the day. At the school, Ms. C the library assistant graciously accepted the set of books promising to either put them into circulation or save them for the spring book sale. After checking this off my list, I popped into Ms. D's classroom (she is a faithful follower and has appeared in the blog twice already) to say hi. As we conversed, she asked me if the honeymoon period of the challenge had worn off yet. Ahhh, my weary expression must have said it all. She read me like a book. You see, it is not that I am at a loss for things to get rid of nor am I bored with the task and the writing. I am simply swamped with obligations, appointments, and responsibilities - call me overbooked. There are days that this challenge adds that one extra task to an already full plate. What I explained to Ms. D is that my weariness is just part of the journey. And persevering through the valleys is what will make it all worth it in 307 days when my challenge comes to an end.

I am not the only one feeling the weight of being over scheduled. The girls juggle school, chores, soccer, and piano lessons on a weekly basis. In a bit of serendipity, on this very day where we all began with a bit of drudgery for what the week ahead has in store, it rained all afternoon. Soccer practice was canceled and homework assignments were light. As I worked out my stress through culinary craftsmanship in the kitchen, the three girls played with their Little People village on our living room floor. Together they laughed and played, creating an imaginary town for the plastic people to live, work and play. On this suddenly rainy "unbooked" afternoon, a few hours of leisure was just what the doctor ordered.

We Deliver

After all of the hassles that the Master depicted in his year long downsizing journey, I must say I was hesitant to jump into the Craig's List world. But, with valuable goods left over after the big yard sale we simply had no choice but to turn to the online flea market to hawk our goods. It turns out that luck was on our side as Craig's List virgins. Dajuan listed both our glass top accent tables and our Yakima bike rack. After over a month, he sealed the deal on both listings in the same day. Together the cash sales totaled $123 (one buyer had only $73 on hand and Dajuan refused the $2 in change). Not bad for a day's work!

Here's the catch (and why I think the transactions were completed) - Dajuan delivered the tables and the rack to the buyers, both of whom lived in the Bath/Brunswick area. Yup - we are Craig's List sellers who deliver. Now before you call us crazy for taking a Sunday afternoon to drive 30 minutes north to deliver used goods to strangers let me clarify. Dajuan spoke at a "Bouncing Out Bullying" event in Bath today and on his way home delivered the goods to the buyers as promised in various email exchanges. This all came together after several attempts at meeting up with buyer Bruce here in Portland. The shocking thing for me was that the folks were actually home with cash in hand. I'm still waiting on my last Craig's List item to sell - a Little Tykes junior slide for only $15. Let's hope I don't have to drive to Caribou to make it happen!

See Spike Run, See Spike do Yoga, See Spike Swim

Spike has more blog entries (see the archives) dedicated to him than any other character mentioned in my downsizing story. And he is not even born yet. This kid is destined for great things.
To equip him for a third sport (perhaps a triathlete in the making?), tonight while at Spike's Mom's baby shower I handed down a floating device that he can use from the ages of 6-24 months. I also handed off a crib matress pad for use during Spike's post workout naps. Kendra had a ball spending lazy summer days drifting about in the pool and lake. Since she declared the other night that she can swim (see the entry "I Fwim") I decided that the baby float was destined for downsizing. Always a good sport, Spike's mom Christy accepted the hand-me-down items. I suspect that she'll put the float to good use as she is an avid swimmer and will certainly want to pass her love for the water sport on to her first born.

As Christy packed all of her baby shower loot into her car, I noticed that glazed look that we all get when we realize just how much STUFF babies "require". Fearing that she might reject the float based on size alone, I quickly deflated it and bragged about it's ability to collapse into it's storage case. Since I couldn't actually get it to fold up I declared, "I bet Rob (her husband) can figure it out!" After all, isn't figuring out gear a required skill for dads?

Hall School's Greatness: Chalk it up to fabulous teachers!

Last night at the first PTO meeting of the year I was reminded of how very lucky we are to be at Hall School. While the physical structure leaves much to be desired, (although a few parents have dedicated countless hours to improve the appearance by creating amazing murals and beautiful gardens on the grounds) what takes place for children within the walls is certainly one of a kind. When we moved here from Milwaukee we landed on Alden Circle without researching the schools (chalk that up to being a clueless parent of a 5 and 3 year old). By some miracle, our Alden Circle address equated to placement at Hall School. For that, we will be forever grateful. Don't get me wrong, there have been bumps in the road - no school experience is perfect. But by in large we have had an unbeatable educational and developmental experience thus far.

With budgets frozen and classroom populations swelling, it is the teachers that are on the front line, taking the bullets as our country battles over the importance of funding education. And yet, remarkably my kids come home everyday with stories about fabulous learning going on in their classrooms. My hope is that the teacher's don't become so weary from their workload that our kids begin to suffer.

Keeping the hard times in mind, I once again dug into my basement to find some treasures to deliver to the school today. After the girls and I sang in the chorus this morning, (thank you Ms. S for the energy you put into directing an elementary chorus!) Kendra and I dropped into Ms. D's (featured in this blog entry) classroom. Since Kiera had Ms. D for 1st and 2nd grade, I am aware that she provides alternative, all inclusive recess activities for students such as dance party and sidewalk chalk art. Our gift to Ms. D and her new crop of 1st graders was 3 packages of ice cream cone shaped chalk that we had acquired in birthday goody bags this summer. Kendra and I handed over our gift and Ms. D (a faithful follower) excitedly had the kids pose for a picture.

My feeling about this measly gift is similar to how I felt when I made my Unleaded donation to the teachers - like it is just a drop in the bucket. In any case, I believe that this downsize will put a smile on Ms. D's students faces today. But, she probably already had that covered.

Paying Homage to the Va-Jay-Jay

Warning : stop reading if you don't like discussing female anatomy!


Tonight is the season premier of my favorite TV show - Grey's Anatomy. I no longer have a TV so while I wait with anticipation to see if the show is aired live on ABC.com, I want to take the time share with you my favorite moment from the show. Not only did this scene make me laugh like crazy but it changed the way that the modern woman refers to her private parts as noted in this New York Times article. It is only because of this subtle unoffensive word - Va-jay-jay - that I can even write tonight's blog entry. Thank you Miranda and Oprah!

Today's downsize is being made in an effort to pay homage to the Va-jay-jay and Grey's Anatomy. Several months ago as I made a mad dash through the feminine products aisle of Hannaford I grabbed a box of tampons. Not until I arrived home and used the first of the little cotton bullets did I realize something was awry. Suddenly I had a burning feeling - literally - that things were amiss. I returned to my bathroom cabinet to investigate and found that in small print, next to the word regular were the dreaded words fresh scent. After digging through every spare purse in the house I found a lonely unscented savior and replaced it's floral scented step sister. Then, I fumed for quite awhile about the money I had wasted on the box of scented tampons. Upon comparison of the two products I realized that the packaging was almost identical and the word scented was far too camouflaged for any woman to see, especially a woman in a hormonal haze. Beyond that, I question the ethics of Tampax. According to ACOG use of scented feminine products is not recommended. In fact, in this brochure regarding Va-jay-jayitis they list scented feminine products as a big no-no. How can Tampax in good conscience put the scented boxes right next to the unscented variety? I'm beginning to wonder if they are in cahoots with the makers of Monistat.

The truly insane part of my story is that I have kept the box of scented tampons in my cabinet - tempting fate for sure. Tonight, the risk of grabbing another Va-jay-jay deodorizer is over. I contemplated placing the box of scented wonders in the locker room at work but reconsidered as I feared a yeast outbreak among my coworkers. So instead I have trashed the tampons and recycled the box. Consider this the first step in my save the Va-jay-jay movement. Now off to catch Grey's on my Mac...

"I fwim!"

My first glimpses of Kendra Dee were when she was swimming around in my amniotic fluid at 20 weeks gestation. Tonight, as I watched her flail her arms and legs as she laid on her belly in the tub and exclaimed with glee "I fwim!" I thought about the miracle of the first 2 years of life. Babies go from completely dependent on us for their every need to feeding themselves, jumping, running, and talking up a storm in just 24 months. And it all goes by so fast! The question for me is how to capture these fleeting moments without amassing keepsakes that Kendra will someday have to either trash or store.

While cleaning out the closet in Kendra and Kiera's room, I came upon a manila envelope containing various mementos from Kenda's birth. Tucked in the corner were a ceramic dinosaur planter and a musical clown flower holder - both gifts delivered to me while I was in the hospital. For a week or so these items sat on the top of my cedar chest. Tonight I tackled the pile - confident that with my downsizing prowess I'd blow through that stack and keep very little. It turns out that sorting through keepsakes is not my strong point. What I found were several cards written by Shayla and Kiera with endearing messages such as "Dear Mom, I was so happy to share my room with the baby Love Kiera" and "I welcome the baby with something full of love. We all take a big warm hug and give it to her for a welcome gift. Nothing could be better than giving love to you and her. Love, Shayla". These are keepers, at least for now. What I did part with were a newborn Pamper (it is unclear to me why I kept it), 2 duplicate hospital name bands, a piece of paper with some times written on it (apparently I was tracking my contractions but they were only 10 minutes apart) and a few other gift cards - all trashed and recycled. The flower holders are also going away - to the default : Goodwill.
As I stowed the remaining items back in the envelope, I peered into my cedar chest. There appears to be more downsizing opportunity there. I'm afraid though that I'll have to go slow and be thoughtful as I continue to contemplate the importance of the things that we save along our child's journey. Tonight at least I have paired down a bit and enjoyed reliving those precious moments of July, 2008. After all, isn't that what keepsakes are for?

Price Tag Swapping

Some of us need to downsize and others don't. My friend Mel falls into the later bucket. She is one of those folks whose house looks like a magazine cover on her worst day and who maxes out her Goodwill donation every tax year. She is the friend who sold us the bunk-y-beds a few weeks back as mentioned in this entry. What I failed to mention is that she got rid of the beds before her hubby even had a chance to build the new sleeping quarters for her youngest. This lady is a master downsizer without a need to rant about her donations and gift giving in a crazy blog. Did I mention she is also an amazing friend and confidant?

When she called today to tell me about her preparations for a big yard sale this weekend I chuckled and asked what she would be selling. According to Mel there is a huge pile of goods waiting in her garage to be stickered for the big day. I guess this just highlights for me that we all have too much stuff and are in a constant battle to funnel our goods in and out of the door. What a crazy merry-go-round that never stops! Having our yard sale under our belt, I offered to lend our collapsible tables to Mel and Scott to provide them with ample display space. With downsizing in mind I also gifted my dear friend with our leftover price tags - no need to buy a fresh pack! As I handed over the labels Mel expressed concern about how to price things appropriately. I gave her some sage yard sale advice : figure out your goal - to make money or to get rid of stuff - and let your pricing be led by your desired outcome.

Feeling that my stickers and advice might not fly with my faithful followers as a bona fide downsize, I threw in a book I read over the summer for good measure. I have no doubt she'll breeze through it in the next few days, throw a 25 cent sticker on it and sell it in her sale on Saturday.

The Drain

I never expected raising children to be cheap. But, I must admit that there are certain expenses that I didn't factor into our family planning. As the girls get older, there seem to be miscellaneous costs that come up on a fairly regular basis. Most of these items are things that we could do without but are a "must have" at the moment. School pictures fall into this bin of random unnecessary expenses - and it drives me crazy.

Tomorrow is picture day thus I am just sitting down to blog after over an hour of hair straightening for my oldest princess. Please don't mind any typos - they most certainly can be attributed to the blisters on my fingers from touching hot hair (note, if your children have straight locks you will never know this pain). But the discomfort has only just begun. Right after blogging I will fill out the dreaded picture order form and the checks for no less than $26.30 - that is $13.15 per kid for the lowest package offered. If I go with this option I'll receive a total of 12 pictures. Not exactly a blockbuster value!

Now I realize I am sounding like a real cheapskate. Allow me to break this down. If I spend $13.15 per year for 12 years that will cost me $157.89. Multiply this cost by 3 and I'll spend a staggering $473.67 in my lifetime on school portraits. Mind you, I use the term portraits loosely. Let's just face it, most years the photos are a flop. Inevitably the girls are scheduled for photos immediately after gym class. So much for all of that hair prep!

I thought about digging out past years school photos and tossing the extras (because we never end up ordering the smallest package) but then I realized that they fell victim to one of my pre-downsizing challenge purges. Instead, tonight I emptied a milk jug full of "Fish Water" (the slightly chlorinated water that we used in our former fish bowl - last used about 3 years ago) down the drain. I am hopeful that it will flush out the dollars that I am tossing down the drain by ordering the ceremonial school pictures. I'm recycling the empty jug - as I'm sure to do with the extra copies of sub-par portraits that are headed my way.

Belt and Braces

When Shayla began her orthodontic treatment just over a year ago we went belt and braces when it came to the care of her precious metal brackets and the young teeth that lay under them. I spared no expense and bought every oral hygiene gadget on the market to assist her in keeping her choppers clean. This included an expensive purchase of Platypus flossers. These little gizmos are supposed to make flossing a breeze for folks with braces. Shay has used them some but not on a consistent basis.

As we head into our week, Shayla is counting down the days until Thursday. This will be the day of braces removal. As you may recall, I blogged about finishing payment for phase I of these perfect smile makers. Translation : there will be a phase 2 in our future. So in celebration of the upcoming big day I decided to pass on our unused Playpuses to Shayla's partner in brackets Meaza. For those of you who have seen me in the last 4 weeks, you know that I just got my own set of braces. Originally I thought I'd be able to use up the overpriced flossers but alas, my teeth are so tight that they break the floss in half. I've had to resort to the labor intensive Bridgeaid dental floss threaders. Who knew that there was an entire industry preying on those of us who are already broke from orthodontics?

At any rate, Meaza was happy to accept our gift today. And will be even happier when she reaches her own countdown to removal day. In the meantime, I'll be her partner in brackets.

Running for Office Part II : The Copycat

While reading the newspaper today I came up to speed on the latest political goings on. It seems there is a copycat in the ranks of top female republicans. Apparently, Delaware republican Christine O'Donnell has ridden the coat tails of a lipstick wearing pitbull into the race for Senate. Wow, I wonder if she also speaks Palinese?

In other copycat news, faithful follower Bethany C. jumped on my downsizing bandwagon by purging her entire kitchen today after discovering that she couldn't cram one more coffee cup into her cupboard. She also found entirely too many wine openers in a drawer and took photo evidence that she then shared with me on Facebook. If you recall, I had a similar find a few Fridays ago as documented here. As you know, beginning to copy downsizing behaviors is what led me to this crazy personal challenge. Beware readers! The next victim may be you!

Sticking with the copying theme, today my refurbished mitsubishi copier went out the door. As mentioned in the original Running for Office blog, I was only able to donate part of my used office equipment to Ruths's Reusable Resources. The copier and fax machine were too old for resale according to Ruth. And so today we completed our office downsizing by donating the outdated machinery to Goodwill. I say "we" because I had to put my downsizing staffers to work to get it done. Dajuan and Kendra traveled to the brand new South Portland Goodwill only to have the copier rejected. Fearing the wrath he would face if he returned home with the copier, he made a second stop at the Forest Ave. Goodwill and dropped it off so fast they didn't have time to reject it. Kendra, all the while was taking mental notes of Dajuan's poor donation station etiquette. Let's hope she doesn't ever mimic the drop and run - lord knows she is copying everything else these days!

Fabric of Our Lives

Momma told me there'd be days like this. It is Friday of the first full week back in our fall routine. Phew - glad it is almost behind me! After a glorious few days getting things in order at home, fitting in workouts, and spending extra time with my Kendra Dee, Thursday and Friday have been rather hectic. School activities, soccer, and two days of work for me have almost put me under. But, not a minute too soon Friday evening has arrived. The girls and I shared pizza, salad, root beer and wine (only me of course) while we waited for Dad to come home. We laughed and shared tales of our day. All the while, I had that "I haven't downsized yet" feeling lurking in the back of my mind.

As we wrapped up dinner and the dancing on the carpet began ( an evening ritual for the girls) Shayla looked at me and said, "we could go through my t-shirt drawer. I'm sure there is a downsize in there!". I was completely moved by the fact that she was thinking of me and supporting my commitment. As I agreed she flew up the stairs and tossed down the contents of her drawer. In a flash we folded and sorted her shirts. Kendra was the benefactor of an outgrown Rice University shirt and the rest of the discards are piled by the door for Goodwill in the morning (I'm sensing a Friday night pattern here). This is a rather mundane downsize.

What is entirely special to me is the spirit of my children. They, no doubt, perceived the weariness of my soul and yet they (and especially Shayla) found it in their hearts to sing, dance and downsize in support of their mom. To me, this is the essence of love. I'll take it.

Running For Office

Today's downsize took some running around. After a day at work that allowed for little sitting time, I was on the road to pick up Kendra, grab the big kids, and then race to my donation destination only to circle back for the annual Back to School BBQ. I imagine that the candidates feel the same way as the race for governor heats up and they travel the state to woo voters. Of course, one candidate gets his sustenance from sipping tea and he seems to be experienced at flitting from one location to the next while establishing residency in 2 states. Anyway, I digress.

While cleaning out clutter corner and the office space (noted here) I pulled several items that were once an integral part of my Mary Kay business. No longer in use, the fax machine, refurbished copier, and a tall pile of plastic file holders were deemed yard-salable. Apparently people aren't starting businesses these days (the current business climate in Maine is sad, isn't it dear candidates?) because no one snagged these items at the our sale. Believing that I could find them a meaningful home, I have stowed them in the garage ever since then.

I placed a call to Ruth's Reusable Resources - if you aren't familiar with Ruth's, it is an amazing resource for teachers- in hopes of dropping my discards off to her. It turns out that the only thing of value is my stackable plastic file holders. Go figure. I guess I should have taken my copier and fax machine to the guys at eWaste Maine! Ruth's idea for my outdated equipment was to take it to Goodwill. Ahhh, the great downsizing default. That will have to wait.

With the van loaded and the kids in tow I raced to Ruth's and dropped of my donation of binders and file folder trays. While there I noted the towers of stackable file trays for sale. It seems there is an abundance of these useless organizers floating around. Let's hope some of the teacher's that shop at Ruth's find them useful!

As we finished our multiple stop journey, we landed at Hall School. The teachers (who are sure to be tired from their first two weeks in school) dutifully handed out hot dogs, burgers, and chips to their students and families. Meanwhile, the girls and I enjoyed the companionship of our Hall school friends. A competitive soccer game for the kids and some political bantering with my fabulous friends. What more could we ask of a Thursday evening? Oh I know, we could ask for a news flash announcing that all of the gubernatorial candidates have dropped out and we can vote for new ones! Alas, that is too much to ask. I guess I'll just keep trying to fix the world's problems with downsizing, one lonely item at a time.

Sticker Shock for a Knit Wit

Knitting is when of those hobbies that I pick up for a bit and then drop for a while. I've been off of it for awhile and don't anticipate picking it up anytime soon with my current daily task of getting rid of one thing and then writing a mini essay about the experience. Let's just say that free time is not an abundant commodity right now.

During one of my more active knitting phases several years ago I happened upon a shipment of quality yarn at dirt cheap prices at Marden's. Heeding the warning in their slogan, I went ahead and bought it when I saw it. The lure of the Almighty Bargain got me again! Since purchasing this boat load of yarn, I have stored it neatly in a plastic tub at the bottom of the guest room closet. Since then, I have not completed one scarf, sweater, or potholder from the yarn that I purchased. As I counted and tallied the cost of the mountain of yarn today, I was shocked to discover that I had spent over $35 on the skeins. Mind you, that purchase was made based on how much I was saving. Thank goodness I have discovered that shopping for bargains is not the path to riches. Thank the Lord also that Mardens is no longer located less than a mile from me!

Not wanting the yarn to go to waste I offered it to the art teacher at Hall School. She was happy to accept it to use in her knitting club as well as for stringing name tags. Phew, my $35 is going to go to good use after all.

As I left for the school this morning, I contemplated donating the plastic tub along with the yarn. This time I succumbed to the pressure - namely my affinity for Rubbermaid tubs. I shoved the yarn in a straw bag and stowed the plastic bin in the basement with the others that I have emptied. I guess I'll tackle one addiction at a time!

Pay to Play?

With both Shayla and Kiera playing soccer again this fall you can find us at a local field for either games or practices on 4 out of the 7 days of each week. "It is a short season" one parent recently said as we chatted about our fall schedules. Yeah, seven weeks of soccer isn't long at all. But, without breaking stride Shayla will head into basketball season which will seamlessly feed into Kiera's hoops season. After a few breaths and stretches we will lace up some tap and hip hop shoes for a bit of combo dance class in the spring. This all adds up to a bunch of shuttling, late dinners, and occasionally some overtired kids. It also brings endless amounts of fun. This is what being a sports family is all about. So while I lament a bit about the demands of organized sports on young kids today I wouldn't trade my athletic girls for a couch potatos any day.

Dajuan and I both achieved some level of success in sports (one of us more than the other of course) and we hope that our girls have similar experiences through athletics. However, with the current state of affairs in public schools, it is looking as if high school sports may not even exist by the time our youngest is ready to hit the field. Headlines everywhere are threatening the elimination and/or reduction of athletic teams and events. Pay to play has already been instituted in many Maine communities. While I understand that our schools are in crisis and our state is out of tax dollars, I cringe at the thought of making sports a privilege for the elite. The very kids who need the challenge, structure, and comradery that sports provide will be the ones that are left behind when fees escalate and fundraising becomes a requirement.

Apparently, I am not the only one out there with some concern about the financial demands that accompany participation in sports. One Westbrook family has created a program to help assist families with keeping their kids in the game so to speak. Check out this article detailing their plan for an organization called Re-Play.

After reading the article in yesterday's paper I knew that my downsize for today was a slam dunk. I discovered two pairs of lightly used soccer cleats in Shayla's closet during the great room reorganization and had planned on trying to sell them at Play it Again Sports. That adventure will have to wait - these cleats are officially donated to Re-Play. Never fear though, there will be more lightly used athletic footwear to sell in my future. Dajuan's size 17 shoe and my dainty size 11 are proving to be a potent combination. Shayla is donning a woman's size 9 1/2 cleat this fall and the growing isn't over. We are already paying to play with footwear purchases alone. Isn't that enough?

One kid's trash is another kid's treasure!

During the great room reorganization the girls found an array of small treasures in the nooks and crannies of their rooms. As they began to toss them into the trash can I thought of the waste we were creating with all of these trinkets. If you are a parent you know the things I'm talking about - the Happy Meal toys if you will. For a family that doesn't do drive through dinner we sure have amassed a collection of small toys. It seems that you don't need to be into fast food to earn such prizes - kids are given countless palm sized doodads just for plodding along through life. Then parents and kids are faced with the dilemma - are these trash or treasure? Feeling guilty about sending the gems to a landfill, I bagged them up and came up with a brilliant idea. I would give them to Ms. C.

After spending a kindergarten year with each of the girls in Ms. C's classroom, I knew very well that she has a prize box to which kids earn access for various good behaviors. We were the recipients of many treasures in our 2 years! Stocking her box seemed like a fabulous way to give back and say thanks to Ms. C for getting both girls off to a fabulous start in elementary school.

Today we handed over the bag of goodies and chatted with Ms. C for awhile. It was fun to reminisce with her about Shayla being in kindergarten and to celebrate the fact that Shayla is now the big kid on campus. Ms. C has taught countless 5 year old kids through the years yet she has a way of making my girls feel special each time she sees them. After posing for a photo, she thanked us for thinking of her before trashing the treasures. Let's hope the parents of the current kindergarten students are equally thrilled to find their little one's backpack filled with loot!

Woman in the Mirror

As I stated in this post, I try hard not to freely give out parenting advice. This is mostly because at the very second I begin to think I've got this gig all figured out my children kindly point out that I have a lot to learn. I often say that God made children to act as mirrors for parents. They reflect back an exact image of mom or dad. This feels great when they are portraying some of our more appealing characteristics. It also gets quite ugly and uncomfortable as we recognize our not so lovely but very human qualities.

This morning, I had one of those mirror moments. As we struck off for church, my girls dutifully grabbed a plastic bag complete with a set of toys that I was planning to downsize to the nursery. Shay and Kiera looked on and even assisted me yesterday in finding the items in our mountains of dolls and accessories. And so, I assumed all were in complete agreement with the plan. Today, as we climbed into the van one sister outed the other (I'll leave names out on this one) by declaring that said sister was not happy with the donation because she had purchased the doll with her own $10. I was less than happy with this unveiling of selfish feelings. How could she be upset with giving away one of a zillion dolls? What did it matter that it was purchased with her own money? And somewhere deep inside I was frustrated with this potential roadblock for my planned downsize for the day. After all, I had the blog entry penned in my mind and a witty title chosen.

We processed the entire scenario as we drove across the city and eventually my little girl was reduced to tears. It was in this moment that I stopped and realized that while I probably had some well founded concerns about her not wanting to give away some toys, I also had allowed my own agenda to drive my behavior. I quietly began to think about how I would feel if someone was pillaging my things and giving them away without asking. I contemplated how my personal challenge is feeding my ego and what sort of example that is setting for my girls. Finally, I concluded that if I want my girls to have giving hearts that I need to be modeling that behavior. Perhaps they are clinging to their things because they are replicating what they have seen me do until the last 42 days.

As we stepped out of the van I pulled my daughter aside and hugged her and apologized. I asked her to trust that she can verbalize her opinions to me and that while we won't always agree, what she has to offer does matter. We agreed that the set of toys would stay in her possession until she decided that she wanted to give them away. Together, the girls and I are going to work on weeding out some things but they will have some decision making power in the process.

This humbling exchange sent me into my own closet to find something of mine to get rid of. On this cool, overcast, fall afternoon I didn't have to look beyond my shoe organizer to find something expendable. As the open toed shoe season comes to a close, it is a perfect day to throw away old flip flops. After several seasons of wear my Keen sandals have seen better days and so they are officially trashed. While digging for them, I came upon several pairs of sneaker inserts that I no longer use thanks to my orthotics. And as I searched for a pair of slippers to warm my chilly toes, I deemed one pair too disgusting to wear. All of these things are in the trash now - a sort of shoe cleansing for my soul.

Peering into the garbage bag I paused and thought about my footprint - its' size and shape and depth. As I think about walking through life with six little feet following along, I pray that my path is worthy of following. I hope that I can be a shining example for my precious girls.

EWASTE

Thanks to the Maine Red Claws and eWaste Maine, today's downsize was a cinch. There was a fabulous event in the expo parking lot featuring an oversize Crusher and multiple tractor trailers lined up to haul off any discarded TV's, VCR's, computers, and other electronics.

The girls and I joined Dajuan at his post under the Red Claws tent and had the pleasure of meeting Mike from the eWaste Maine program. As I handed over a plastic bag full of old cell phones and chargers, I inquired a bit about the eWaste program. I was fascinated to find out that the manufacturers of many of these products are mandated to pay for the recycling and disposal of the things that they sell to consumers. Through drop off events like the one held today, we can recycle our stuff without paying the fees at our local recycling centers. And, eWaste of Maine is a local company creating jobs for Maine people. Talk about a feel good downsize!

What lingered with me after my disposal of multiple cell phones (dating back to our Milwaukee days) was the reality that I will have the need to dispose of more cell phones in the future. It seems that each time our contract runs out we are lured into acquiring new free phones with extra bells and whistles. But, my friends, there is nothing free about getting a new item to replace one that still works only to recycle it in a few years. And, if your household is typical, there are other electronics being updated and upgraded on a regular basis - all adding up to piles of eWaste. After all, technology has been rigged to force the consumer to buy new models at regular intervals. Gone are the days of fixing things and keeping them around for decades. We have become a society equipped with disposable gadgets. So, while I feel that the eWaste program goes a long way towards offering safe, green options for consumers to dispose of their obsolete electronics I can't help but yearn for the option to purchase ipods, phones, and computers that would last a lifetime.

TGIF

After a crazy day at work I was shuttling Shay and K.G. to soccer practices on this fall afternoon when my cell phone rang. It was my friend Christy calling to report that my blog has inspired her to do some of her own downsizing. Great news! My deepest desire is that downsizing could take our culture by storm. After reporting a monumental purge of Spike's closet (Spike has been referenced here and here in my blog) and a return of a N.W.T. item, Christy was left with a pile of hardly worn dress clothes from 10 years ago. She inquired about good destinations for her lightly used threads. Sadly, I was not much help to my dear friend. While we all hope that our barely used clothing can earn us some cold hard cash or at the very least be donated to a lady in need, the reality is that such resources are hard to come by. Consignment shops have complicated rules and regulations and organizations such as Dress for Success often are not accepting donations except for cash. After hashing over this reality, Christy commented "that sounds like too much work, I think I'll take it to Goodwill". I thanked her for her enthusiasm about my blog and then shared my current state of panic - it was 5:17pm and I had not downsized an item nor did I have a plan.

Christy was right, downsizing is hard work. So is my job as a nurse in the ACU at Mercy. So, on this Friday night I could not wait to finally sit down with my family to chat over a few slices of pizza and sip a glass of chardonnay. As I opened my bottle of wine, I came upon an extra wine opener that I never use, a duplicate foil cutter, and a journal that I stowed in my cabinet several years ago. I once thought it was a fabulous idea to keep a wine journal detailing the selections I/we had sampled and any other notes about the particular bottle of vino. Apparently this eureka moment was in 2007 and I have only partaken in 3 bottles of wine since then. Or at least that is what the journal entries declare. Needless to say, these 3 items are not an integral part of my existence. After ripping out the one page of wine reviews, I put the journal and accessories in a bag by the mudroom door. They are going to Goodwill tomorrow morning. I decided against a late night cruise to the donation center after consuming 2 glasses of an oaky classic - no need to drink and drive in the name of downsizing! I chuckled as I closed the book to the journal and noted the poem on the front cover. It reads "Don't Quit" - how very fitting for a wine connoisseur!

The Shirt Off My Back

A few weeks ago I wrote (here) about my friend Adrianne from Milwaukee and her return to sanity this fall after juggling the beach balls of summer. We had quite a long conversation over the hum of our 2 year old beauties babbling and whining in the background. The amazing thing about my friendship with Adrianne is our ability to connect on a deep level even after spending 5 years apart. It seems that in our random phone calls, emails, and notes we find that our lives are running along on very similar courses and our personal journeys have many commonalities. Adrianne spoke to me about feeling tapped out after a busy summer of doing everything for everyone else. While she loves being a wife and mom there are days that she feels she is teetering on the edge. I literally felt her pain because my life and hers are so very similar. Our spirits are aching in much the same way as I too try to figure out how to navigate this complicated role of woman, mom and wife. This conversation we shared left me longing to sit and sip coffee or wine together while swapping war stories. I imagine that we would cry a bit, then prop each other up with a hug and some laughter. Together we would realize that for all of the trials and tribulations we wouldn't trade our blessed lives for anything. But as luck would have it there are thousands of miles between us and too little time left in our busy schedules to connect on a regular basis.

I've had a lingering want to send just the right little thing to Adrianne. Today I believe I have come upon it. As I mentioned here I read a book recently called Gift from the Sea. I was struck at the time by Anne Morrow Lindbergh's analogy of a woman's life to the various offerings of the sea. Her words resonated in a very current way despite the fact that she penned the essay in the 1950's. I believe that these words will speak to Adrianne in much the same way. I contemplated sending her my copy and tossed it around in my mind for a few days. At the end of my internal debate I found that my copy of this book, complete with a note on the inside cover from my mom, is one that I want to keep and perhaps hand down to one of my daughters someday. So in an upsizing moment, I stopped at Border's and bought a fresh copy for my dear friend. I did not send it immediately as I yearned to find something to give to Adrianne. Then, there in the bottom of my tshirt drawer I discovered the exact item that I was searching for. My Simplify tshirt - complete with yellowed pits and stiffened 100% cotton from washing. I purchased this shirt a few years back and wore it on a regular basis in an effort to share and internalize this mantra. I'm not sure that it has fleshed out in a more simple existence. Since I bought it we've had our 3rd child and I've gone back to work as a nurse. A strange take on simplification, huh? Obviously, a simpler life continues to be a goal for me evidenced by this personal challenge. If downsizing one thing a day and blogging about it daily doesn't sound like a journey to the simple life, I'm not sure what does. At any rate, the Simplify shirt is on its' way to Milwaukee. Perhaps Adrianne will cry or laugh when she opens the package. My hope is that she understands that our friendship transcends all space and time. She is so special to me I literally gave her the shirt off my back. My sincere wish is that the mantra Simplify will come to fruition for her.

Go Fish

This challenge has taken on the feeling of a game lately. Most of my downsizes are hatched from thinking about the expendable items in my house and then trying to match them with the people I encounter or the activities of the day. It really makes this entire exercise more entertaining and allows me to weave it into the fabric of our life.

Today after racing to an early morning dentist appointment I dropped the girls off at school. While delivering Kiera safely to her classroom, I casually asked her teacher Mrs. O if she could use two empty glass fish bowls in her science corner. Unfortunately, my offer was a few days late. Like any resourceful teacher on a shoestring budget, she had jumped at the chance when she spotted an aquarium with a sign that said "free" on the roadside. I'm not going to lie, I had already decided that this was going to be an easy downsize before entering the school. Reeling a bit from being turned down, I paused and then asked if she knew any teachers that might be in the market for fish bowls. She directed me across the hall to Ms. V's room stating that "she is always collecting creatures". Perfect! Ms. V was Shayla's teacher 2 years ago so there was an established relationship. Shayla and I poked our heads in her open classroom door and were greeted warmly. I got right to the point and offered my donation. Luckily, Ms. V is the head of the science curriculum at our school and said that she'd be happy to take our bowls and store them in the science closet even if she didn't need them right away. I promised to drop them off later in the day.

The girls and I arrived back at the school a bit later than I had planned and found that most of the teachers had departed for the day. Not to be detoured from our mission, we placed the fish bowls and a small net on Ms. V's table and left a note for her. Because the picture has evolved into an integral part of my blog, I insisted on taking a snap shot of the scene. I must admit, I was desperately hoping that no one came upon us to ask what we were doing in the empty classroom. Can you imagine trying to explain the downsize, the fish bowls, and the need for the photo? Check out the image at left, you can almost see the angst on the girls' faces. And little Kendra was taking notes for later use I'm sure.

As it turned out, we left the building without a single inquiry. I hope that Ms. V and the students at Hall School can house some interesting creatures in those bowls through the years. At the very least, they will be right at home in the science closet. After all, for much of their time as vessels for our pet fish the water and scum on the inside of the bowl were a science experiment themselves. Which is exactly why they are now empty and being passed on.

Unleaded

The long awaited, highly anticipated first day of school arrived today. I must say, it was one of our smoother day after labor day mornings. Perhaps we are getting in the groove after 6 consecutive years. Kendra couldn't even throw us off of our school preparation game when she woke up, took off her own diaper (dry I might add) and proceeded to pee in the potty. We just took that in stride by having a small pee-pee party (complete with a reward sticker) and moving straight into breakfast. I'll give her credit though - it was a valiant effort to steal the limelight.

Today, however, is all about Shayla and Kiera. It is hard for me to believe that they are entering 5th and 3rd grade. I realize every parent utters these words but, it truly feels like yesterday that I was putting Shayla on the bus for her first day of kindergarten. Now she is roaming the corridors or Hall School as the top dog - a fifth grader. And, my Kiera has left the comfort of grades K-2 to explore the challenges of third grade. I realize more everyday why parents give the sage advice to cherish every moment. If only it were easier to do that!

As part of our last week of summer we reorganized bedrooms as discussed here. You can only imagine the piles of treasures we uncovered under beds, behind dressers and in desk drawers. One particular gem that we found in abundance was pencils. My guess is that they reproduced while in their dark hiding spaces. How exactly we accumulated this large collection of lead instruments I may never know. What I am sure of though is that we will never be able to write enough to use them all.

This lead me to a perfect downsize for the first day of school. After putting the kids on the bus I packed Kendra up in the car and drove to Hall School. The bell had rung and the kids were safely in their classrooms. I signed in and took my collection of fancy pencils to the teachers room and left them with a note inviting teachers to take them and put them to good use. Given the poor state of financial affairs in schools (and homes for that matter) I figure every little pencil can help. As an added benefit, this errand gave me an excuse to chat with the principal and say a quick "hi" to Kiera's teacher who I met in the hall. Even after six years of sending my babies off to school, there is a little piece of me that misses them terribly and worries about them too. I guess that is why I'm called Mom.

Retail Revenge

Labor Day has become another one of those holidays that originally had a significant meaning but now has evolved (or deteriorated) into just another day that people have off from work or school. The first-ever Labor Day was in September of 1882 and was established "to celebrate the social and economic achievements of American workers," in the words of the Department of Labor. Now, let me just throw this out there to my faithful followers - When was the last time that any of us looked up from our BBQ pit on the first Monday of September and reflected on the American worker?

As with most holidays, Labor Day is now celebrated all over the country with back yard parties and by retailers who use it as an excuse to lure shoppers with the Almighty Bargain. Sales flyers were bursting from my Sunday newspaper - all of them advertising unbeatable prices in celebration of Labor Day. Hmmm....I wonder how valued all of the cashiers feel as they toil away on their special day?

I decided to take a stance against the exploitation of Labor Day by retailers today. My first stop was at Target. Equipped with my receipt dated September 2nd, I bellied up to the customer service desk and asked for a price adjustment (I figured using their lingo would work best) on the two twin sized comforters I had purchased less than a week before. While paging through the Sunday circular I noticed that the quilts had been marked down by $12. Since I bought two of them, the refund was $25.19 including tax. The clerk in the red shirt happily credited my card. Now, for my bold act of protest...

My hunch is that retailers offer the price adjustment policy in part to provide good customer service. In addition I believe that they gamble that few people will bother to track the difference between what they paid and the sale price. Most folks are just too busy! Finally, if a customer (like me) does make a return trip for a refund on the difference the retailers hedge their bets that said customer will wander around the store and spend the refund and then some. Well, they met their match today. I promptly pocketed my refund receipt and bolted for the parking lot. How do you like them apples Target?

While on my protest march around the Greater Portland area (ok, it was only two stops), I waltzed into the LL Bean outlet armed with two items - a pumpkin orange corduroy jacket in XXLT and a canvas passport/ticket holder - both with tags. I had no receipt (and no idea when they were purchased) but decided to live on the edge and go for the return. For those of you who live in Maine, you know that Bean's return policy is gracious and lenient. We are fairly frequent shoppers at the home of the Hunting Boot and rarely utilize the 100% guarantee. But, with a downsize on my mind and a bone to pick with retailers who were open on Labor Day I chose to put the return policy to the test. As I stood at the LL Bean counter waiting as the sales lady rang up my return items, I had a pang of guilt. While I had no receipt, I had a hunch that Dajuan and/or I had paid very little for these items. However, per their policy Beans had to refund me the price featured on the tag. As the clerk computed a grand total she asked if I planned on shopping today. I launched into a small dissertation about my downsizing challenge and my need to get rid of these items. I added that I was protesting the labor day sales and therefore was not going to be lured by the signs that declared "take an EXTRA 50% off today!" She pointed out that I was still putting her to work on Labor Day by returning items. Good point. But, my intent was to take money from the retailers instead of padding their pockets. In any case, I walked away from the store with a gift card for $59.75. Not a bad haul for 10 minutes work.

And that concludes my Labor Day rebellion. Perhaps next year I will get even bolder and more outspoken. I must say though, I don't completely object to our current version of this holiday. Dajuan cooked up some pretty mean BBQ ribs today!


Just to clarify - I only counted the $59.75 towards my downsizing profit. The price adjustment was just for fun!

Getting off the Swag train

I don't know which definition I like better - the Merriam Webster which defines swag as a suspended cluster (although this refers to evergreen branches) or a depression of the earth (which I would call appropriate if one considers the depressing impact of "free" stuff on our environment), or the urban dictionary description of swag. I especially like #5 - "the stuff/sh@# we all get". But, for me the ultimate definition of swag is the anti-downsize.

Perhaps we have more swag than the average family due to Dajuan's 16 years in the entertainment/marketing/promotions industry. There was a time when we would be hard pressed to let a week go by without accumulating a mug, t-shirt, or international McDonald's happy meal toy. Our home in Milwaukee was bursting with freebies from every brand Dajuan encountered. Now, maybe because of lower swag budgets we receive significantly less branded items. Although, we discovered no less than 5 Maine Red Claws bumper stickers and several lanyards in our bedroom purge yesterday.

As part of our overhaul of Dajuan's drawers (no, not his shorts) we selected a few NBA sweatshirts from his days with the NBA Jam Van. Although we could have dumped them in our Goodwill drop last night we decided to gift them to our buddy Mashard. He is a growing boy at our church who has an affinity for hoops - and Dajuan. Hopefully we'll save his mom a few bucks this fall on their back to school shopping!

This unloading of 2 pieces of swag is only the tip of the iceberg. Dajuan has bags full of t-shirts and boxes of Bailey's ice buckets and drink mixers in the belly of our basement. At least it is a start though - which is all I can ask of my family as they jump on board of my downsizing train.

Good Will for the Big and Tall

A few years ago, a friend of ours showed up at an 80's themed party sporting his best Miami Vice getup complete with suede tie up dress shoes. As the night wore on he began to have a back ache that wasn't related to any break dancing. We all had a good laugh as he discovered that the shoes he had purchased at the Salvation Army early in the day had apparently been donated by someone with one leg substantially shorter than the other. One shoe had a 1 inch lift on the heel - making poor Kevin's legs dreadfully uneven. After laughing out loud for some time about this situation, I remember thinking that some folks just should not donate their castoffs.

I must admit that as Dajuan and I pulled into the Goodwill drop off drive through tonight as we made a late night deposit to complete the downsize for today, I chuckled about Kevin's shoe lift mishap. I can't help but wonder if Dajuan's stature (all of 6'9") might deem him ineligible as a Goodwill donor? Not waiting around to ask if there was a clothing size cut off, I stashed our 4 bags of goods in the bin, took a receipt and hit the gas peddle. I figured the 2 bags of gently used girls clothes might off set any problem with the 2 bags of 2XLT shirts and pants.

While I worry that some of you might think I'm wearing out the Easy Button with my Goodwill trips, please know that I put a fair amount of elbow grease into today's downsizing effort. Lest you forget, we are only 1 week post-yard sale and yet we were able to produce 4 bags of clothing, 1/2 bag of trash, and 3 bags of recycling from our 3 bedrooms alone. This is either a sad commentary on our clutter ridden status or a reflection of our new found minimalism. I'll let you choose.

In any case, as you head out to Halloween parties this fall - please keep an eye out for costumes involving big and tall clothing. Chances are, you'll know just where it came from!

Bail Out

Kendra Dee is officially out from behind bars and has moved into her new sleeping quarters. As part of a room reorganization at our humble abode, the three girls are being reshuffled. Shayla is reclaiming her original solo quarters in the northwest portion of the house. Kiera is reasserting her ownership of the room on the southeast corner and "inviting Kendra to stay". With all of this rearranging, we also evaluated the sleeping vessels. With Kendra now 2 years old, we determined that she could move to a big girl bed therefore shedding the bars that had housed her for the first 24 months of life. We had the good fortune of purchasing some gently used bunk-y-beds (as Kendra named them) from a friend in the middle of her own remodel. With all of the correct furnishings and locations in place, we decided to shed the crib and changing table. At this point in the downsizing challenge, we are past the point of contemplating storage.

I was assuming that Spike (featured in this blog entry) would be a likely recipient of our used items. Apparently his/her parents have already purchased the nursery gear. But, as luck would have it, Spike just got word that there is a cousin on the way and he/she is still in need of baby provisions. AND, Spike's mom is willing to store the disassembled goods until her sister can pick them up. Talk about an ideal downsizing situation!

With the baby furnishings safely out of our possession, I tucked our growing girls into bed tonight knowing that I won't be lowering another slumbering infant into a crib until we perhaps have grandchildren someday. The crib that we passed on was the one that we had purchased for Shayla and then used for both Kiera and Kendra. We did not sell the crib before our move from Milwaukee even though we had no plans for more kids. Then low and behold we put it to use 4 years later for our baby Kendra Dee. And so now as I wash my hands of the baby bed, I feel it is a strong statement of completion. We have been blessed with 3 beautiful baby girls and that feels like just the right number.

The Dog Ate My Homework

My post for 9/2/2010


In keeping with my back to school theme I am using an excuse for not posting yesterday - the photo did not arrive in my email box until after I turned in for the night. How is that floating with you my faithful followers?

Shayla is entering the 5th grade this year and has a teacher who is new to our school. Mr. C was kind enough to open his classroom for the afternoon to allow parents and students to drop in for a meet and greet. Always eager to make a connection with the person who we'll be working with for the next 10 months, we took the sweaty jaunt over to Hall school in the 90 degree heat. Despite sweltering temperatures, the school was buzzing with teachers preparing for their pupils to arrive next week. Mr. C made a fabulous first impression with his gentle and easy manner and his jovial disposition. He spent close to an hour chatting with Shayla, Dajuan and I. I get the distinct impression that this guy loves his profession and that he loves kids even more.

This mini open house provided the perfect setting for a back to school themed downsize. As we headed out the door, I grabbed several books from the Eubanks Family Stacks (mentioned here and here) and tucked them under my arm. I asked Shayla to pose for a picture with the books thinking it would do irreparable damage to take a photo of she and her teacher during our initial meeting. She still rolled her eyes and sighed - a response I am becoming ever so familiar with these days.

Once in Mr. C's classroom, I clutched the books in my lap hoping for the right moment to offer my gift. I began to fear they would be deemed unnecessary as Mr. C detailed the various crates and shelves of literary selections in the classroom and then added that he had boxes full of books left to be unpacked. Being the daughter of an elementary teacher, I should have known better than to let such angst enter into my mind -teachers love books, period. As the conversation began to wind down I offered our gift to Mr. C. He graciously accepted them and showed great interest in my personal challenge and blog. He even insisted that we take a picture of he, Shayla, and the books with his camera and promised to email them to me. Poor Shayla, her worst embarrassing moment was realized. Luckily, she is too polite to give her brand new teacher the sigh and eye roll. That is reserved for me!

You've been schooled

With back to school preparation in full swing I took a peek in my file cabinet to see what my "Shay's School" and "Kiera's School" folders contained. Not so surprisingly, the file folders were bursting with school handbooks from 5 years ago, preschool diplomas, and bus discipline policy contracts. In addition, there were report cards from every trimester for each child -that makes a total of 24 report cards! If I keep accumulating paper at the current rate, I will need an entire file drawer to house the files.


In less than 10 minutes I whipped through the files and made a large contribution to our blue recycling bin. Every single report card - gone. All outdated flyers and handbooks - gone. Preschool diploma - gonzo as well. Now before all of my faithful readers start throwing parenting books at me, let me explain. I am a very sentimental gal. Taking pictures and savoring memories through them is one of my favorite pastimes. And until this space and time I held onto many other pieces of memorabilia. But, I have come to realize that many of these items hold less significance than I once believed. As I skimmed over each report card it became clear that the 3's and 4's next to math and reading did not bring back any flood of happy memories of younger versions of Shayla and Kiera. Even the teacher's comments fell short - especially since the comment section on the computer generated report cards leaves room for about 1 sentence. How does one give any sort of meaningful commentary on my child under such constraints? What I'm really saying here is that I am fortunate enough to have kids that are chugging along through school at a fairly decent pace. This is not a surprise to me - or their teachers. And no number assigned to a line will serve a purpose in my upbringing of them or in capturing a memory of their school career.

There were a few things I saved and refiled. Copies of their vaccination records seemed pertinent so they were safe. I also held onto the username and password for each child in order to access "power school". From what I gather, this will allow me to peek at their test scores, assignments, and attendance which apparently is important in the upper grades. Talk about encouraging helicopter parenting! Finally, I saved a letter from Kiera's 1st and 2nd grade teacher. As I reread it, I pondered the 2 years that Kiera spent with Ms. D. Her letter was not specifically about Kiera but more of a self reflection. She shared about the transformation that she had made in her travels with this classroom of kids. Ms. D taught much more than the math curriculum and the latest reading tactics. She poured her soul into the kids in hopes of making them better citizens and friends. In her letter she quoted something that her dad always said to her as a child when he was encouraging her to invite anyone she could see who was alone to join them for a cookout. "Sometimes people are alone because they want to be and sometimes they are alone because nobody ever invited them in." This was the sort of life lesson that Kiera was exposed to over the last two years. For that I am thankful. And, as a way to remember her journey with Ms. D through 1st and 2nd grade - I will hold on to the letter.